A phone conversation with my cousin from Malaysia, Lambi (not her real name!) sparked the idea for today's post. Lambi is a virtuous gem of a girl, and i salute her dedication to helping the underpriviledged community. thinking of people who do good led me to think of one of my boss/good friend's metaphors for a phenomenon called, in her words, "Angel Addiction".
Most of us have been afflicted before at some stage by Angel Addiction. When I was 12, my favourite story (and it still is) is called A Little Princess. Some of you may have heard of it. One of the parts of this story that i constantly re-read was when Sarah, the main character, in her most wretched state, cold, starving, miserable and abused, found a dollar in the gutter and after asking around for its owner, was offered 6 warm buns for it by the baker to eat. However, she passed by a beggar girl who was even more wretched than her, and in all her kind angelness, she decided to give one, then two, then three four and finally all five of her buns to her, leaving only one for herself.
I will not comment on the appropriateness of her 'virtue', if virtue can ever be inappropriate in the first place. However, Angel Addiction is when one is addicted to the idea of, in my opinion, how OTHERS view at and admire their long sufferingness and lack-of-self-care-in-lieu-of-othersness, and this drives them forward to continue their virtuous acts. in fact, many of us act for charity with a little bit of this addiction driving us. many long suffering mothers also unconsciously subscribe to Angel Addiction. i find it hard to admit, but sometimes, if not most times, i do good, unconsciously EXPECTING some kind of admiration from others. after all, i was Sarah's No. 1 fan, and still am :P Needless to say, some forms of addiction are actually positive!
However, addicted or not, I am learning to take better care of myself. Like a tree, sometimes she nurtures her leaves, and keeps them close by, on her branches. But when winter comes, and she herself needs some TLC, she very wisely lets go of her leaves, and builds her strength up in winter. When spring comes, she is fully able and strong to protect, grow and nurture her leaves again, even bearing fruit! Nature is great telling us these stories eh?
Without an emotionally solid, stable mother, chidren grow up psychologically unstable. If we view the people we help as our wards or children, we need to also be solid and stable ourselves first, especially if one works in a caring/helping profession. No pressure, though, and by no pressure that means if we falter, we have to be like the tree in winter, and accept our own frailties and protect ourselves first.
Lambi, this blog is dedicated to all the good work you do, and also to YOU! Boy am I glad that the same white angel blood runs in both of us! Sarah's joys knows no bounds ;) Go have a cone and celebrate, Christie!
Most of us have been afflicted before at some stage by Angel Addiction. When I was 12, my favourite story (and it still is) is called A Little Princess. Some of you may have heard of it. One of the parts of this story that i constantly re-read was when Sarah, the main character, in her most wretched state, cold, starving, miserable and abused, found a dollar in the gutter and after asking around for its owner, was offered 6 warm buns for it by the baker to eat. However, she passed by a beggar girl who was even more wretched than her, and in all her kind angelness, she decided to give one, then two, then three four and finally all five of her buns to her, leaving only one for herself.
I will not comment on the appropriateness of her 'virtue', if virtue can ever be inappropriate in the first place. However, Angel Addiction is when one is addicted to the idea of, in my opinion, how OTHERS view at and admire their long sufferingness and lack-of-self-care-in-lieu-of-othersness, and this drives them forward to continue their virtuous acts. in fact, many of us act for charity with a little bit of this addiction driving us. many long suffering mothers also unconsciously subscribe to Angel Addiction. i find it hard to admit, but sometimes, if not most times, i do good, unconsciously EXPECTING some kind of admiration from others. after all, i was Sarah's No. 1 fan, and still am :P Needless to say, some forms of addiction are actually positive!
However, addicted or not, I am learning to take better care of myself. Like a tree, sometimes she nurtures her leaves, and keeps them close by, on her branches. But when winter comes, and she herself needs some TLC, she very wisely lets go of her leaves, and builds her strength up in winter. When spring comes, she is fully able and strong to protect, grow and nurture her leaves again, even bearing fruit! Nature is great telling us these stories eh?
Without an emotionally solid, stable mother, chidren grow up psychologically unstable. If we view the people we help as our wards or children, we need to also be solid and stable ourselves first, especially if one works in a caring/helping profession. No pressure, though, and by no pressure that means if we falter, we have to be like the tree in winter, and accept our own frailties and protect ourselves first.
Lambi, this blog is dedicated to all the good work you do, and also to YOU! Boy am I glad that the same white angel blood runs in both of us! Sarah's joys knows no bounds ;) Go have a cone and celebrate, Christie!
With love from your addicted cousin :)))
A sleeping baby Ganesh... taking care of himself! I love!You may like to read a related topic on taking care of yourself here
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